Not Many, Just ONE

Soooo, I'm in Grad School. That alone is a testimony in itself. I can't even thank God enough! For more on that journey, check out thegradualprocess.tumblr.com




ANYWAYS... Going to a grad school out of state seems to be one of the motivating factors for why so many people have encouraged me to get on online dating sites. Before now, I never thought of online dating of anything other than a LAST resort. Of course, I will never knock anyone for being on dating websites; to each his own. As for me... Maybe I'm being traditional, old-fashioned or picky. But I cannot let go of the belief that God has some amazing man in store for me and all I have to do is continue to walk in the path that God has for me.


I'm reminded of a word God gave to me this summer:


I was going to be a camp counselor for the second half of the summer and company regulations required camp counselors to wear a one piece dark, solid colored bathing suit. Of course, my bathing suit was orange and yellow with flowers, so I set out to find a bathing suit. Mind you, this was
mid-summer and the pickings were slim. I went from store to store with no luck. Finally, I entered a store that had only a few bathing suits left. I remember feeling like there was no way that I was going to find a bathing suit that fit me of the 10 left hanging. But, what do you know? I found one! And it was perfect. Everything that I needed.


God really spoke to my heart at that time. It was something to the effect of, "You don't need many options to pick from. You just need the right one and when you find that one, there will be no question in your mind. He will be everything you need."


So, I'm ok with not having too many options. God knows best. This is HIS project.


What project do you need to place in God's Hands?


Selah [pause and think]

It ain't easy, but it's worth it.

Since being in a long term relationship, I told myself that I wasn't going to date for a year... Then after growing in the Lord and realizing things about myself, I realized that the next time I dated it would be for real and that next guy would potentially become my husband. No more games. No more emotional roller coasters. Ummm yeahhhhhh, easier said than done.

Though I have yet to be in another "declared" relationship, I have emotionally invested myself in certain friendships, with daydreams, thoughts and what not. It even got to the point where I considered laying down my standard to date someone who I knewwwww with my heart of hearts would not and could not be my husband.

It wasn't until today, while have a discussion on relationships with some younger teenagers, that I realized I was actually preaching to myself. I am worth so much more that petty relationships that are bound to end. I am worth more than a summer fling. I am the daughter of a King and as such, I cannot and will not allow a pauper or a slave claim me.

So, what's the lesson here? Wait, until you are sure beyond any reasonable doubt that this guy/girl is your potential spouse. But, Steph, it's hard. Wait. Steph, all my friends are in relationships. Wait. But, this is how the world shows me to find love. Wait! It's not going to be easy, but it'll be so worth it. Just think about all the heartbreak and the tears you are saving yourself from. One of my favorite songs, "Letting Go," by Reliant K, says, "The end will justify the pain it took to get us there." There is some amazing person that God has designed all for you and being with that person will justify the wait and the pain of waiting. As I type this out, I'm totally preaching to myself.

Selah [pause and think]

A Love Story for the Books.

I always dream of that diamond ring dazzling on my left ring finger. I dream of wedding preparations and that perfect dress. I’m African, so I dream of that perfect African outfit for the reception. I imagine the colorful bridesmaid dresses. I dream of walking down the aisle, smiling so brightly. I get up to alter and my pastor is smiling, ready to read the vows. I look at my man… WAIT… Where’s his face? It’s a blur. I don’t know who he is! I’ve tried to fill his face with guys that I like/ liked, guy friends, or even random guys, but none seem to stay. Sometimes I THINK I know exactly who he is and sometimes I think I’m wrong. Maybe I haven’t met him… Or maybe he’s a friend. I can’t wait to meet him or for the romance to be revealed. But I know that God hasn’t revealed him yet because I’m not ready. But until that time, I know God will work on me to make me the woman I need to be, the woman right for him. I’ll grow and learn all that I need to learn. So when I finally do walk down the aisle, it will be to become one with the man that God has created JUST for me. I know he’ll be all that I could ever dream of and more. He’ll be worth the wait.